Clear Present & Past

Hello, everyone! It's been a while since my last blog, and I've found myself immersed in an entirely unfamiliar world. Meeting a diverse group of people, many of whom are younger than me, has been a pleasant surprise. Their friendliness and warmth stand in stark contrast to my experiences back in England.

The journey has been quite the adventure—great weather, though the culinary experiences have been a bit hit or miss. I'm learning new things in both modern and somewhat old-fashioned ways, some of which resonate with my engineering background. Admittedly, I don't agree with about 50% of the rules and regulations I'm required to follow. Some seem unnecessarily lengthy and tedious, while others feel antiquated as if nobody bothered to update them.

One of the more irksome aspects is dealing with people's interpretations of poorly written words, especially by those with limited language proficiency. Their personal judgments further complicate matters, posing a challenge for someone with an older age and a professional background. Without delving too much into the specifics of my current endeavours, I'll keep this brief. Unfortunately, I need to address the topic of mental health. I find myself once again navigating the intricacies of schoolyard behaviour, with individuals intentionally twisting my words and making fun of them—a clear manifestation of bullying.

While humour and making people laugh are positive experiences, putting someone down is an entirely different matter. These actions often stem from underlying issues, such as the need for control, seeking a temporary ego boost, a desire to judge, the need to inflict mental and/or physical pain, unmet unresolved needs, a drive for domination, diverting attention away from oneself, and unresolved anger projected outward.

Understanding that such behaviour is rooted in personal insecurities is crucial. Human behaviour is complex, and individuals may be unaware of the reasons behind their actions. Despite these challenges, I yearn for a breath of fresh air and an escape from it all. It's unfortunate that, as I interact with people—many of whom are non-native speakers of my mother tongue (English)—I notice a common thread: a lack of life and social experiences that define my own. Being significantly older, I can only exhibit resilience and remain incognito until I achieve my goals and extricate myself from this situation.

It's not all doom and gloom; the people I've met in my current life are truly amazing. I can envision them reaching new heights in the future and reminiscing about their adolescent escapades.

Yet, amidst this vibrant present, I can't help but feel a yearning for home, my family, and friends— especially my loved ones. The sentiment is reminiscent of my time away in Afghanistan and Iraq during my service to the queen.

Reaching the halfway point of a century brings a certain comfort with the luxuries of life. With corporate escapades behind me, I find myself set in my ways. Change, especially reverting to basics, isn't something I readily embrace. It's at this juncture that I reflect on how I could have steered clear of a path leading to such a scenario.

While I miss the thrill of travel, and exploring undiscovered lands, the current circumstances limit my opportunities. Well, that's a chapter that will have to be explored at a different time.

In the meantime, let's savour the rest of the "get the F outa here" moments and make the most of the present.